The Great Election Swindle

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“The Great Rock and Roll Swindle,” a movie that is alleged to be the true story of the ’70s punk rock band the Sex Pistols, tells a tale of how Malcolm McLaren, the band’s founder and manager, controlled the rise and fall of this infamous band.

In the story, McLaren tells us how he handpicked four angry young men to form a band. This band had no talent, but a few songs that would work up England’s troubled youth into a frenzy. He limited the number of live shows the band played in order to keep the “swindle” alive. McLaren figured that if no one could actually see them play live, then they would never figure out that this group of drug abusers had no musical ability and record sales would continue to soar.

After [last] week’s debacle in which Sarah Palin’s handlers refused media access to a high-profile event, I have no choice but to feel this is a remake of the original “Swindle”: this time call it “The Great Election Swindle.” Not to be confused with Bush 43’s theft of the 2000 election. …

The McCain-Palin Campaign has a keep-Sarah-Palin-away-from-the-media-at-all-costs attitude and one must wonder why. If you have a candidate who looks great until she opens her mouth, it seems she hasn’t even purchased a ticket for the Straight Talk Express, let alone know where to board. It makes sense to keep her away from any real media scrutiny.

Palin is still telling people she sold a jet on eBay. Not true. Palin is still telling people she fired the chef. Not true. Palin is still telling people she killed the Bridge to Nowhere. Not true. Palin is telling people that she is against earmarks. Not true, especially considering she just asked for 31 earmarks totaling $197 million for the 2009 budget in Alaska. Palin is still telling people that McCain is not a Washington insider. Not true. John McCain has been in Washington for over 25 years. They are also telling people that they are mavericks which, of course, is not true unless you are thinking of his calling for the resignation of the chairman of the Federal Election Commission when you find out you can’t fire the chairman of the Securities and Exchange Commission. Because you can see Russia from some parts of Alaska, Palin thinks that she has foreign policy experience. This is clearly a stretch, but heck, McCain doesn’t even know that Spain is in Europe and not Latin America.

So now you understand why the media is not allowed to question her: the campaign needs to keep the swindle alive.

Ahhh, “The Great Election Swindle.” I only wish they had names like Johnny Rotten or Sid Vicious, but then maybe they do. Coming to a polling place near you. Opens November 4. Buy your tickets early.

— Daniel J. Mancuso is publisher of the Shelton-Mason County Journal in Shelton, Wash., where this article originally appeared.